Kool-Aid and politics

ARE YOU ready to keep your promise’ I’ve posed this question many times to educators at in-service programs to kick off school years. No hands go up. Then, I continue, “Back in May, you prayed, perhaps silently, “Oh, God, if you’ll just get me through this month, I promise I’ll come back in August, ready to give it my best again.” I’m glad they made the promise, and I’m glad they’re back. Few chapters in life equal the excitement and a “sense of the possible” offered by new school years. May God bless everyone at the schoolhouse. Most educators live out each day committed to teamwork, achievement and optimism. Several years ago, though, I overheard a conversation dominated by “I don’t like” comments’all from one disgruntled teacher. “I didn’t like the kids last year, I don’t like the kids this year and I won’t like the kids next year. In short, I don’t like kids,” the teacher said. A question came from the crowd of “gruntled” teachers, “Do you believe in reincarnation'” “I’m not sure,” she answered, “Why do you ask'” “Oh, if you did, you could pray to come back as a childhood disease,” her colleague said. * * * * * WAS I DREAMING, or was there a news clip of Secretary of State Colin Powell answering how he felt about the new Colin Powell doll’ His response: “First of all, it’s not a doll, it’s an action figure.” Speaking of political figures, did you notice that the Democratic senators’ retreat to Albuquerque extended well beyond their House counterparts’ trek to Ardmore’ One political wag insists both groups did it “on the cheap,” getting bargain basement hotel deals on the Internet. He said they offered bids for accommodations outside of Texas at hotels in cities starting with the letter “A.” Hey, is this an “RHIP” (Rank Has Its Privileges) thing’ Somehow, the representatives got the Holiday Inn in Ardmore; senators settled in at the Marriott in Albuquerque. Several of the exiles in New Mexico went on a “fact-finding trip” to an Indian reservation. The visit was indeed instructive. Now they can make lanyards. * * * * * AT THE Dallas Cowboys’ training camp in San Antonio, players are wide-eyed and open-mouthed reading the coach’s daily posts on the bulletin board. New posts appear each day announcing rules’both “thou shalts” and “thou shalt nots”‘all somber and to the point. Players can’t wait to get the latest “Parcells’ post.” (You don’t like that one’ How about his BILLboard’). * * * * * “Veeeerrrryyyyy interesting!” That’s what the little guy on the tricycle used to say on TV’s “Laugh-In.” Today, he would fall off his trike with so many giggling opportunities on the left coast. There is a real possibility that the Golden State’s new governor may be movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger, a candidate who so far hasn’t been able to pronounce “California.” (I’m not sure how many of the 500 plus candidates can!) Hey, wait! Maybe Arnold might start calling it, “The Golden State.” Wonder if he’s checked with another showman, Jesse Ventura’ The former wrestling star was elected governor of Minnesota but soon decided that wrestling, and most other pursuits, are more fun than being governor! Ah, government allows no staging and no re-takes.Or does it’ * * * * * WITH MEGA-millions coming to the Texas Lottery, not many will worry about the actual odds of winning the jackpot’one in 135 million. One observer said, “If you want to win the lottery, just raise your window. The odds of buying a winning ticket and one blowing in from outside are about the same.” * * * * * NOW HE’S not to be cut too much slack. But Mark Cuban’s comments (the ones he made about Kobe Bryant’s Colorado escapade) may fall into the “it figures” category’if the latest rumor is true. It has not been confirmed if Cuban and unsuccessful gubernatorial candidate Clayton Williams are cousins. Of course, Cuban hasn’t run for public office’yet. * * * * * Are you telling me you don’t know what a lanyard is’ Didn’t you ever go to Vacation Bible School’ Remember braiding those strings of colorful plastic to make key ring thingies for Mom and Dad’ At our church, they bought the plastic stuff with money saved watering down Kool-Aid. Also, we wrote our names on the little drink cups and used them all week. Dr. Don Newbury, long-time university president, is a speaker/author/ columnist in Burleson, a few blocks south of senility. He invites questions about his books, columns and speaking engagements at phone (817-447-3872) or e-mail: newbury@speakerdoc.com

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