They are coming!

Okay, I confess. I am a real softie when it comes to plants. I belong to the group of people who cry buckets watching documentaries about the destruction of rain forests. I also relate to people who while driving on a lonely country road, suddenly slam on their brakes and stop to look at wildflowers. Just to give you an idea how crazy I am, I have made a deal with several builders in my area. Whenever they are about to start on a new building site, they call me. I then charge ahead like a knight of the round table (except that instead of shining armor and sword of steel, I’m armed with a pair of gloves, shovel and a bucketful of wet paper towels) and rescue most of the wild plants. They become either guests in my garden or I give them (on occasion by force) to my friends and neighbors. A few years ago, while on one of these missions, I found a few wild honeysuckles desperately trying to grow near some huge boulders. Being a naive person and probably at the tme affected with a touch of the sun, I actually felt sorry for them. Anyone even remotely familiar with these plants know that they don’t need any assistance from anybody. It is also equally clear to anybody (even with a brain the size of a walnut) that wild honeysuckles don’t belong in a tame, suburban garden. In fact, they are considered invasive pests that don’t take any prisoners. Then why in the name of everything holy, did I dig up and carry them back to my home’ There is not much that I can say in my defense. My favorite theory is that they were sending me subliminal messages and I was forced to obey their every command. It is also possible that I was full of milk of human kindness and wanted to do something really nice. I don’t know. I’m sure you can’t figure it out either. It will be one of those great mysteries of our time which will make our decendents stop and ponder. In any case, I was the proud owner of six honeysuckles. I sneaked them into my backyard, not wanting to explain myself to my spouse. After all, stupid deeds need no advertising. My idea was to plant them behind the shed, where weeds grow freely and become as tall as oak trees. I figured that my newly found buddies would help me in getting rid of these pesky weeds. A few years later, I couldn’t find any weeds behind the shed, not even the tiniest one. I really can’t complain. There is a little unimportant piece of news that I must share with my beloved partner in life. I need to tell him that the wall of our shed has suddenly collapsed under the weight of these mind snatchers from planet X. As I said, “It is just a little thing.”

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